Silence
by Tisha
Summary: Rei has trouble expressing her feelings to Usagi, until she realizes that they weren't as hidden as she thought.


Silence

By: Tisha

Author Notes: This is the second story in my "Friends Forever" series. The first one was "Undying Love." With this series it's not necessaryto read them all to understand the others. Each is pretty much about different characters. So you can read them individually or together.

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"True friendship multiplies the good in life and divides it's evils.

Strive to have friends, for life without friends is like life on a

desert island... to find one real friend in a lifetime is good fortune;

to keep him is a blessing."

~Baltasar Gracian

•••••••••••••••••••

The bright Spring sun shone down on the park, the one place they always chose to go and spend time together. The rays of the sun illuminated the lake in silvery ripples. The breeze blew the grass, tickling the five sets of bare feet.

The five of them hadn't had such a fun getaway for a while. Usagi was getting married in less than a month and they knew that things would be different then. Usagi was already planning to get a job down the lines after her marriage so that she could help Mamoru save for a house.

Rei watched as Usagi sat gracefully on the shore, running her long fingers through the water of the lake. Rei admitted to herself that Usagi had become much more mature over the years. She had the purest heart Rei believed to be possible in a human being. Rei could never admit it to Usagi, no matter how badly she wanted her to know. She had tried before to word her feelings properly, but she never quite could. Her heart was too stubborn to admit it.

Usagi squealed loudly all of a sudden as Minako splashed her. Makoto watched the scene as she soon became a living shield for Minako, who was running from Usagi. Ami lifted her book to keep the water from hitting her. Rei smiled to herself as she watched Usagi chase Minako. The two were so alike.

The five of them had been friends for nearly four years. Rei would be eighteen in a week, as Makoto already was. Usagi would actually still be seventeen when she was married. Usagi finally stopped running madly after Minako and strolled slowly toward the lake instead. She glanced at Minako, still hiding behind Makoto, and Rei who was nearby before making a quick motion, flinging her foot in the water. It went all over Makoto and Rei, and they both went after her. Usagi giggled happily, dodging her friends as Minako and Ami watched from safe locations.

•••••••••••••••••••

The day of Rei's birthday turned out to be slightly cloudy. The weatherman had given a 60% chance of rain, but that didn't stop the girls from going through with their plans. Rei had insisted that she didn't want a party or anything big, but wasn't too surprised to arrive home from school to find that eight of her friends had decorated the shrine and were waiting for her.

"Usagi I bet this was all your idea. Figures you'd forget I didn't want a party."

Usagi just responded by exploding a party streamer in her face. "I didn't forget. I just didn't believe you! You're an adult now!"

Rei barely managed to stop her smile as she looked around the room. She realized it had been a while since she saw Haruka, Michiru, Hotaru, and Setsuna. "Well thanks for coming anyway, all of you."

Minako snorted and thrust a package toward her friend. "Gosh Rei, swallow your pride and enjoy yourself. Open some gifts!"

Rei glared at her friend but sat down and received the gift anyway. All of the other girls handed her theirs as well. She sighed and started working away at the wrapping paper on Minako's. She laughed as she pulled out a small stuffed toy in the shape of Sailor Mars. "Thanks Mina-chan. It's cute."

The next gift was from Ami. It was a book (so like Ami) all about the Tokyo of several years before. It had several nice pictures of old landmarks in it. From Makoto she got a red sweater that she had sewn, and a batch of her favorite cookies. Hotaru gave her a CD of one of her favorite groups. Haruka and Michiru had put their money together to buy her a special kind of pillow to sit on when she did fire readings, and Setsuna had given her a dress that she had designed herself.

The last gift was a small box from Usagi. She opened it and gasped at the gift. It was a silver chain that contained a single ruby on it. She swallowed, wanting to thank her friend and hoping that she could. "Wow, this is nice. I thought you would have blown your allowance at the arcade."

Usagi crossed her arms. "Yeah, well I didn't. I've been saving parts of my allowance to buy you that for a few months." Rei was quite surprised at that thought. It made the small gift something to really treasure. She bit her lip and smiled genuinely at her, hoping that Usagi knew how grateful she really was.

She put the gifts into a small pile next to her chair and looked at the group. "What now?"

Usagi was quick to answer. "Mako made a cake!" All eyes turned to the cake that was dripping with chocolate frosting and no one could resist having at least one slice. Conversation ranged between various subjects as they ate. When Minako finished she put down her plate and stood up, facing Rei.

"So sorry to do this at your party Rei, but I've got to." She then turned to Usagi who looked at her with her eyes wide. "Usagi-chan. It's two and a half weeks! WHO is gonna be your maid of honor?"

Usagi finished chewing the bite of her third slice of cake and slowly looked between her friends. "I don't think that's relevant. This is Rei's party."

"Don't use me as an excuse!" Rei was getting a bit frustrated that Usagi hadn't chosen anyone yet anyway. She secretly hoped it could be her but she really thought Usagi would pick Minako. They had the most in common and Minako was the most adamant about it.

Usagi bit her lip. "Actually... I already know who I'm going to choose."

"What? Then why haven't you just said so?"

"Yeah, we all know that you can only pick one and we are not going to feel left out."

"We just need to know!"

"Just gimme a few more days and I'll tell you."

Makoto had finished her helping of the cake and put her hands on her hips. "If you have decided, why keep us waiting?"

"I... I just can't tell you yet. Let me think out the details for a few more days, okay?"

She had four unhappy friends after this announcement but stuck to her plan to wait. They all went home with their stomach's full of Mako's cake and their minds very curious. They did, however, each have a theory of Usagi's decision.

•••••••••••••••••••

The next day Rei fastened the silver chain around her neck and smiled at the way the small gem sparkled on her neckline. She slowly fingered the small treasure until a voice startled her.

"Hey, where'd you get that? A new boyfriend?"

Rei turned to find her grandfather in the doorway. "Grandpa, haven't I told you to knock?"

He just smiled. "Well?"

Rei sighed. "Usagi gave it to me for my birthday."

Her grandpa smiled. "Really? How nice of her. I knew that girl was a good friend for you. She sure is nice. I've always wanted you to have a nice close friend like her."

Rei looked at her grandpa, puzzled. "What do you mean? I'm always fighting with Usagi."

"I know, and I guess that's your way to express your feelings. Just the way you were raised, I guess. I could tell how you really feel about her though."

Rei was shocked at what she had just learned. Sure she really did love Usagi. And it was true that the feelings came out in the form of her teasing her friend, but she had always thought that her friends took it as being mean. She had figured the same for her grandpa. Suddenly realizing that he had thought otherwise really made her think. She wasn't even sure of her own feelings anymore.

•••••••••••••••••••

Usagi had invited Minako, Makoto, Ami and Rei to her house exactly two weeks before the set date of her wedding. They all figured she was finally ready to assign a maid of honor to one of them. None of them expected that they would be chosen, since they all had someone else in mind. The five girls sat around the bedroom, discussing school and other topics. They would all be finished with school after this year, and everyone but Usagi planned to go to college.

Rei noted that the picture of Usagi and Mamoru was now displayed proudly in clear sight, even though it had been hidden only a few months ago. The room was clean except for a pile of barely touched homework on her table. Mrs. Tsukino had brought them some cookies and tea which they were now almost finished with.

Makoto, who was seated beside Usagi on her bed finally brought the anticipated subject up. "So, are we here for... say a particular reason?"

Usagi sighed and smiled. "Okay, okay, I guess I have left you waiting long enough."

All of the girls spoke their agreement on that fact and Usagi continued on, almost nervously. "Well... it was really hard to pick 'cause you all know that you're all my really good friends. And even though I could only pick one maid of honor, you can all be bride's maids and I have duties for all of you." She paused and waited for them all to nod. She bit her lip, nervous that she might hurt someone's feelings by choosing.

When the silence continued for several more seconds Ami spoke up. One of the very few times she had said anything on the subject. "Usagi-chan why don't you just come out and say that you chose Rei already?"

Usagi's eyes widened as the looked at Ami, who immediately blushed. She looked at Minako and Makoto, who didn't seem to regard what Ami had said at all. Rei herself looked very shocked. Usagi was about to ask Ami about it when Rei spoke up.

"Why would you say that?"

Ami bit her lip and looked between Rei and Usagi and then shrugged. Minako laughed at the way they were acting. "Oh come on Usagi, we all knew that was who you'd choose."

Usagi looked puzzled. "You did?" She looked to Makoto who nodded, but Rei came snapping around at her words.

"You... you mean you did pick me?"

Usagi's mouth was still open in wonder as she nodded at Rei. Rei, unbelieving that Usagi would choose her after how she treated her, was very surprised to find out they had all been expecting it. "But... why me?"

Usagi shrugged, at a sudden loss for words.

"Rei-chan, you two are very close." Makoto gently touched her shoulder. She realized Rei had trouble expressing her feelings, but she couldn't believe that Rei could also be blind to the way Usagi felt toward her.

Rei stood between them all. Completely speechless for several minutes. She finally sat down and looked blankly toward the floor. "Wow. I never thought you would pick me. I never would have thought that you guys expected it either."

The other three exchanged smiles and then one by one made excuses to leave. Rei suddenly felt very uncomfortable being alone with Usagi. Over the past few days she had found out that her feeling weren't as hidden as she felt they were. Somehow, everyone knew. The thought was bewildering to her.

She heard Usagi make a sound and she finally looked up at her friend.

"Rei-chan it's just an offer. It you don't want-"

Rei cut her off. "No, it's not that. I... I hoped I could be your maid of honor. I just... didn't expect it."

Usagi was quiet for a few minutes as she studied her friend. "Why not? I kind of believed that you knew you were my best friend."

Rei's mouth dropped opened. "I am?" And then she added in her head. You are mine too.

Usagi snorted out a half laugh. "Of course you are."

Rei bit her lip and looked down at her necklace. Why am I incapable of telling her? I'm sitting here and I should be able to say how I feel, but I can't. "Well thank you for choosing me. And thanks for the necklace." Rei decided it was at least a start to be able to thank her for the gift. "I think I should get home."

Usagi stood up as Rei did. "Okay." She sounded a bit disappointed and Rei cursed to herself as she walked toward the door. She was about to leave when she decided to swallow her pride, or whatever it was making her restrain. She turned to her friend who looked at her, almost expecting what she was going to say.

"Usagi-chan..." her voice was soft and she took a deep breath. "I... uh..." She hated how stupid she sounded as she still couldn't get the words out. She stomped her foot, frustrated and then looked helplessly at Usagi.

A smile spread across the blonde's face as she came forward and hugged Rei. The embrace was sweet and sincere and Rei hugged her back. "I love you too, Rei." The words were whispered into her ear and a sob broke in Rei's throat. She didn't know why she suddenly had the strongest urge to cry, or how long the tears had been building up, but all of a sudden Usagi's friendly hug seemed the best place to let them go, and so she did.

Usagi only hugged her more tightly and let her cry. Rei's tears became so intense that her body trembled with the sobs. It was such a relief to know that Usagi had known how she felt. To have her arms pulling her close and reassuring her that it was okay to let herself appear weak. Something that had always seemed so scary before.

Rei tried to calm herself as she pulled back from the hug. Usagi smiled at her and Rei tried to wipe the tears away as she let her breathing calm down. She shook her head as she smiled at Usagi. "I... I..." She trailed off trying to think of the right words. All of a sudden it seemed that the tears had given way to her feelings and there was no longer anything to stop her from saying them. She laughed a little through the few tears that still fell. "You're such a great friend, Usagi-chan. I'm sorry I've been such a jerk."

Usagi smiled and wiped at a tear that was resting on Rei's cheek. She couldn't think of anything to say to her friend. It was strange to see her cry and express her feelings the way she was. It was very out of her character.

Rei realized she should say all that she could while she was able to force the words out. She shook her head, thinking back. "You'll never know how badly I needed a friend when I met you. You have always been like my savior. You rescued me from a life of being alone and now I couldn't possibly ask for better friends." Usagi was still only smiling at her and this time Rei pulled Usagi into a hug, thinking that it was a great feeling to know that how you feel was understood. Just to realize that your love could make the other person feel as good as their friendship made you feel.

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"You never lose by loving. You always lose by holding back."

~Barbara De Angelis

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The End


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